Are our children a reflection of who we are?
A reflection is defined as 4b: An effect produced by an influence
Using that definition makes the answer easy! Parents influence their children every day with words, actions, and discipline. Even when we don't think they are watching; that is when they are watching the most! Kids seem to replicate the worst parts of their parents. As my two get into the depth of their teenage years, I see more and more of myself which makes me angry. I feel like a failure because they adopted the same darn habits that I desperately wanted them to overcome. Part of me wants to give up. Its inevitable. They will become who they want whether I approve or not because honestly, I am the one (or my husband) that influenced them.
Then I think; how can it be too late if I am in a constant state of change? Change is never too late! Parents can change their influence now, no matter the age of their child, and therefore change the effect on their children. So, my goal: CHANGE ME and quit trying to change them. By changing me, I will be indirectly changing what I don't like about my children. Next time you notice something about your child that angers you; step back and look at yourself. Work on you and see if it changes them. (All you teenagers reading this better give me a twitter high five!!!!)
(Tomorrow: What Else Influences My Kids?)